Tilda Primm
Time Travel Impersonator / Hoax Historian
Introduction
Tilda Primm captivated conspiracy theorists and confused historians with her claim that she was a time traveler from 1732. Armed with a Victorian accent, a rusty turnip, and sheer confidence, she gave TED Talks that were 80% illogical nonsense.
Early Life
Tilda was born on August 9, 1985, in Glastonbury, England, during a Renaissance fair. She reportedly believed she was born “out of century” and wore bonnets to preschool. By age 10, she had memorized dozens of outdated insults and began faking antique letters to herself.
Later Years
Tilda toured academic institutions giving “historically adjacent” lectures. In 2021, she retired from public hoaxing and opened a bed and breakfast shaped like a time machine. She is still alive and claims to be “post-aging.”
Contributions
Tilda’s antics sparked conversations about historical bias, hoaxes, and narrative storytelling. Her turnip-based “Chrono-Root Compass” became a cult favorite prop in cosplay and steampunk circles.
Fun Facts
Owns over 70 replica hourglasses, none of which she uses.
Claimed her great-great-granddaughter invented jazz.